There was movement in the nation, for the word had passed around That the dolt whom all regret was led astray, And had joined the wild right-wingers - he was worth a million pound, So all the banks had gathered to the fray.
An Australian Senator invoked the language of THE LITERAL NAZI PARTY to demand a plebiscite on the White Australia policy, 50 years after it was dismantled by Harold Holt and Gough Whitlam.
Barnaby Joyce is a self-interested, openly corrupt, opportunistic scumbag, with no place in Australian politics, but I wouldn't want him to kill himself.
Our brave reporter sets out on a journey of self-discovery as a routine trip home turns into a waking nightmare aboard a suburban train. Life will never be the same.
Eurydice Dixon was not murdered by just one man, her death came at the hands of all men, as we continue to fail to overcome our violent tendencies, and the culture of toxic masculinity that permeates society at all levels. We are responsible. We must do better.
Nothing signals the end of the Australian summer like ANZAC Day. The leaves are changing colour, the nights are getting cooler, and somewhere a brown person is being lynched in the media for daring to question "Australian values".
Hey gang, let's rap. Old man Turnbull is about to drop a deuce on the economy, because his upcoming Federal Budget (which is like, where he hands out all the skrillah) is going to throw hella shade at younger voters, all because he wants to slide into dem Baby Boomer DMs. I'm shook y'all.
It is 50 years since Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. was murdered by white supremacy. We can never forget the fact that Dr. King's legacy was rewritten by the same establishment that helped pull the trigger 50 years ago.
There is no way back to legitimacy for Steve Smith and the current Australian cricket team. His captaincy is over, the international reputation of Australian sports is in tatters, and this cheating scandal goes all the way to the coach, Darren Lehmann.
For the last few weeks, I have been looking for a fresh take on world events, whether it was Trump and international events, the moral failings of celebrity culture, or the daily joke that has become Australian politics. And then my best friend had a heart attack.