G'day you mob. It's been a while between drinks here at shutupandreadthis HQ, with 2019 ending in such a tumult of fire and fuckwittery that it didn't feel right to run with the annual political wrap-up making fun of the cabal of cruel and unusual monsters in Canberra. But, six months of quarantining has left many of us with a severe case of cabin fever (which is not an official COVID symptom, but still wear a mask).
The following is a speech delivered on Dharawal land outside the Wollongong Centrelink, before a march to meet with Member for Cunningham Sharon Bird, as a part of the Tomorrow Movement #NoTurningBack day of action on 19 September 2020.
The following is a speech delivered outside the office of federal Senator for NSW Concetta Fierravanti-Wells at the Wollongong climate rally on 29 November 2019.
Are you tired of the status quo? Do you wish there was another option outside of the two-party system? Have you forgotten that Australia has a preferential voting system? Good news everyone! Australia has a preferential voting system! If you're old enough to remember the last decade of self-interested politicians with no true vision for Australia then perhaps this is the how-to-vote blog for you.
It's a no-holds-barred race to the bottom with Scott Morrison receiving praise for "doing things" while Shorten is attacked for being Shorten; Clive Palmer has paid his way back into political relevance without ever having to pay his workers; and Pauline Hanson's One Nation is competing with the Liberal party for the highly coveted title Most Trash Candidates Nominated in a Single Election.
There is a deeply concerning perception problem in Australian politics, and this has been the case for some time. Many seem to think that the Labor and Liberal parties are essentially the same. In policy; personnel; propensity to knife a sitting Prime Minister; thousands, if not millions, of Australians believe that they could not be more similar.
Only, they're not.
The commercialisation of Anzac Day goes far beyond whichever advertising executive will shit the bed on April 25 with a tone-deaf attempt to cash in on the "ANZAC Spirit".
This is a day which has become a battleground for right-wing culture warriors desperate to exploit the boozed-up bogans eager to defend 'Straya in the trenches of focused and persistent online abuse.
Federal Treasurer Josh Frydenberg is expected to hand down the first surplus in a decade on Tuesday, and according to the Coalition, this is a key sign of a flourishing economy. Despite this, Blacktown Hospital is so critically underfunded that entire wards are remaining closed due to the lack of staff, and staff across the state have claimed that it’s not the only hospital facing such a desperate shortage.
Last year, I tried to offer a white, male perspective on the issue of January 26, because I saw that there was clearly a market for Caucasian mediocrity in the "sensible Centre". Let's try this again.
On a scale of one to ten, Australian politics in 2018 has been a steaming pile of shit. And that's putting it mildly. We've seen yet another LibSpill; Senators openly pining for the policies of the Nazi Party; the government supporting white supremacy; and Bill Shorten still hasn't found a way to make people like him.